Shopping Madness
by ElectricSnowman
Summary: At the local grocery store, Sonic challenges Shadow to a shopping cart race. Shadow is joined by Omega, and Sonic is joined by Knuckles and Amy. Will this race end out smoothly? Or will chaos ensue?


"Friend Shadow, why exactly are we shopping for produce?" Omega asked his dark hedgehog friend.

"We're not, Omega. I'm just waiting for the Faker to show up, so I can ram into him with this shopping cart," Shadow smirked in response.

You see, yesterday, Shadow was at the grocery store. He was minding his own business, when Sonic just so happened to show up. Shadow tried to ignore him, but sure enough, he found him anyway.

"Hey Shadow! What's up?" Sonic asked in his usual cheerful voice.

"None of your business," Shadow spat. He turned around, pushing the cart with him.

Sonic shrugged. "Okay. I guess I won't tell you my idea, then..." He began to walk away.

"Sonic! Stop trying to start a shopping cart race!" Tails yelled.

Shadow turned around. "A shopping cart race?" he asked.

"Yeah!" The blue hedgehog zipped right next to him. "Whaddaya say, pal?" He wore a competitive grin on his face.

Shadow stared at him, but groaned and shook his head. "First of all, I'm not your pal. Second, I got better things to do..." he grumbled, turning around.

"Okay, Shadow...I get it. I mean, only the _bravest_ people are up to racing the fastest thing alive..." Sonic shrugged, before crossing his arms.

Shadow stopped, once more. A scowl came across his face as he faced Sonic. "You think you're so great, just because you saved the world multiple times, eh? Well, I can prove to you that I, Shadow the Hedgehog, can beat you at this shopping cart race!" he growled at him.

"Sounds like a plan, buddy!" Sonic smiled, patting him on the back. "We meet here tomorrow at 3pm, got it?"

Before Shadow could change his mind, Sonic ran off to who knows where.

* * *

And that was where it all started.

So, back to the present, Shadow brought his friend Omega with him to the grocery store to wait for Sonic.

"...But aren't only _you_ supposed to be in this race?" Omega asked.

"The Faker didn't say anything about not having teammates," Shadow shrugged in response.

Sure enough, a figure stepped through the entrance of the grocery store.

"There he is!" Shadow shoved the shopping cart roughly toward the figure, who got hit and slammed into the wall.

"WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT FOR!?" a voice roared, and Shadow recognized that it wasn't Sonic.

"Whoops."

Knuckles kicked the shopping cart away, and stormed over to Shadow. "You BETTER have a good reason for nearly KILLING me!" he shouted.

"Uh...uh...what? I didn't do it. Omega did." Shadow calmly pointed at Omega.

"Negative, friend Shadow. I did not have the cart," Omega replied, confused.

Before Knuckles could do anything else, Sonic and Tails showed up. "Oh, thanks, Knuckles! You found Shadow!" Sonic said.

"What? Oh yeah...sure," Knuckles glared at Shadow, but backed away.

"So, Shadow, I see you're ready for the challenge?" Sonic asked Shadow. "I see you brought Omega."

"And I see you brought Knuckles," Shadow replied, glancing at Knuckles, who scowled in response.

"So then why am _I_ here?" Tails asked, annoyed.

"We need someone to be referee!" Sonic pat him on the back.

"Whoop-de-do..." he sighed.

"So, are we gonna start this thing or not?" Shadow asked, crossing his arms.

"Right on, Shad—"

Sonic was suddenly interrupted by a familiar scream, followed by running footsteps.

"SONIC!"

"Oh _no_." Sonic turned pale as a pink hedgehog ran his way, trampling everything in her path. She came up to him and squeezed him so tight, he was gagging.

"Amy...you're breaking my spine..." Sonic gasped.

Not wanting to hurt him so badly, Amy loosened her grip, but still hugged him. "I knew you were here, Sonic! I KNEW it!" she squealed.

Shadow smirked, and tried not to laugh, as well as everyone else.

"Amy..." Sonic gently pried her off of him. "How would you like to join me in a little competition?" He faced Shadow and grinned, whose mouth came wide open.

"Hey—that's not fair! You'll have two teammates, and I only have one!" Shadow retorted.

Knuckles shrugged. "I see the fairness in it. Omega has more experience than any of us here. He _is _a robot, after all." He smirked.

Shadow thought about that. "That _is_ true...Omega will make a better teammate than any of you!" He grinned triumphantly, coming up with the perfect plan to win this race.

"Whaddaya say, Amy? Wanna join?" Sonic asked Amy.

"I'd LOVE to help you, Sonic!" Amy squealed, before glaring at Shadow. "There is no way I'll let you beat my Sonic!"

"Whatever." Shadow only rolled his eyes in response, before grabbing a shopping cart. "Since I'm faster, I'll push the cart," he told Omega. He leaned next to him and whispered, "Fire at Sonic! If they have no speed; they'll never win the race!"

"Affirmative," Omega replied, getting in the shopping cart.

Knuckles and Amy got in Sonic's shopping cart, with Sonic in front of it as well.

"Ready to start, Shadow?" Sonic smirked.

"You're on, Faker," Shadow grinned deviously.

"Alright," Tails sighed. "There will be 3 laps around the whole supermarket, and whoever finishes at the entrance wins."

Sonic and Shadow gripped the handle of their shopping carts, ready to race.

"3...2...1...**_GO!"_**

The two teams sped off in an instant, leaving Tails behind the dust, who wasn't impressed.

"What's the matter, Shadow? Getting nervous?" Sonic teased, pushing the cart with ease.

Shadow had a little more difficulty pushing the cart, because of how large his robotic friend was. "Of course not!" he yelled.

"Permission to fire, friend Shadow?" Omega asked, preparing his weapons.

"Not yet, Omega..." Shadow muttered. "I'll tell you when the time is right."

The two carts wavered from side to side, unable to tell which one was in first place. Hundreds of screaming people rushed out of the way, or either ran out the exit to escape this madness.

"Are you sure this was a good idea?" Knuckles asked Sonic.

"Come on, Knux! It's just for a bit of fun!" Sonic grinned, as he continued to push the cart. He sped up ahead of Shadow, who was beginning to get annoyed.

"Let's wait until the second lap. Then you can shoot all you want," Shadow smirked at Omega.

If Omega had a mouth, he would definitely be grinning. "Affirmative."

While Shadow was running, though, he happened to catch his eye on something. His eyes widened. "Perfect..." he smiled.

Sonic continued running ahead of Shadow. He glanced back to see if he was catching up, but didn't see anything. Sonic shrugged, before turning around and stopping dead in his tracks.

"Sonic! What's up?" Knuckles asked, confused at his sudden stop.

Sonic didn't answer, drool hanging at the side of his mouth.

_Chili dogs. $0.50 each._

"You gotta be KIDDING me." Knuckles face-palmed himself.

"Be back in a flash, guys!" Sonic zipped over to the chili dogs, taking as many as possible.

Amy looked behind herself and saw Shadow heading their way. "We don't have time—we gotta win the race!" She hopped out of the cart, and started pushing it away.

"Wha-? What about Sonic?" Knuckles asked her.

"No time; we gotta go!" Amy answered, pushing the cart as fast as she could. "Besides, if _I_ win this race myself, Sonic will be head over heels for me!"

"Oh boy..." Knuckles face-palmed himself once more.

Shadow zipped past Amy easily, and continued to run. "Heh. Looks like my plan worked! Now we just gotta keep moving."

He and Omega were nearing the entrance, meaning that lap 2 was about to begin.

"Get ready to fire, Omega," Shadow muttered.

"But friend Shadow...friend Sonic is gone," Omega replied.

"I don't care—just stop the other cart from winning the race!" Shadow told him.

"You are asking me to shoot at a _girl_, friend Shadow?" Omega pointed at Amy, actually sounding offended.

"Amy's tough! She can deal with it!" Shadow replied, surprised that he was questioning about shooting at _anybody_.

"Affirmative, friend Shadow," Omega sighed (if robots could sigh).

Before Shadow could make it to the second lap, he felt something slam against his head. "Ow! What the—?" He picked up what had hit him, and it was a cereal box.

Glancing behind him, he saw that Knuckles was armed with boxes and all sorts of produce.

"Oh, he wants to play that way, huh?" Shadow smirked as he passed the entrance of the store. "Omega—fire!"

Omega's hands were replaced by guns. "Targets locked. FIRE!"

Knuckles ducked when the bullets headed his way. "Amy! Head in the other aisle!"

"Got it!" Amy headed in a different aisle, so nothing but produce was in between them and Shadow and Omega.

"Darn it! Omega, keep firing!" Shadow shouted.

Omega shot at the produce, trying to knock down the aisle that was separating the two teams.

"Here; use this!" Amy tossed Knuckles her hammer.

"What's this for?" Knuckles asked.

"Use it as a baseball bat for the produce!" Amy replied.

Knuckles grinned, throwing produce in the air, before whacking them with the hammer, sending them towards Shadow and Omega.

"Incoming produce," Omega warned Shadow.

"What do you mean—" Shadow was cut off by an apple hitting him straight in the head. He continued to run, only to be hit with more food, such as ham, boxes of cereal, cucumbers, and bananas.

Omega's guns switched to flamethrowers, as he attempted to burn all the produce before they smacked into him.

Shadow was sick of getting hit with food. "That's it!" He grabbed a pineapple, chucking it at Amy. His aim was little off, though.

How so?

The pineapple ended up hitting Knuckles instead. The impact made him slam into the cart.

Slowly, he got back up. "Amy...keep going. I'll be right back," he spoke in a deadly whisper.

"Gotcha," Amy responded, oblivious to what had just happened.

Knuckles hopped out of the cart, clenching his fists in rage as he sprinted towards Shadow.

"Um...friend Shadow?" Omega stopped firing, looking back in surprise.

"What, Omega?" Shadow looked up at the robot.

Omega only pointed behind him in response, and Shadow nearly screamed at how close Knuckles was behind him. Running even faster than before, Shadow attempted to flee from him.

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" Knuckles shouted, and Shadow had never seen him run so fast before.

"Uh...Omega...fire!?" Shadow squeaked.

"Negative. No more ammo," Omega replied.

"WHADDAYA MEAN NO MORE AMMO!?" Shadow screamed, but knew that there was no time to argue. Right now, he had to focus on escaping Knuckles.

"Friend Shadow, I believe we should halt," Omega pointed ahead, but Shadow was looking backwards, trying to get rid of Knuckles.

"What!? Are you CRAZY!?"

Omega tapped Shadow's shoulder, and he turned around. There, right in front of him, was Sonic. His hands were full of chili dogs, and he turned around just in time to see Shadow head straight for him.

"HOLY—"

_**SMASH!**_

* * *

"Now, guys...what have we learned?"

"_Never_ get distracted in a shopping cart race..." Sonic sighed.

"_NEVER_ hit Knuckles with a pineapple..." Shadow said incredulously.

Tails smirked, crossing his arms as he glanced at the two hedgehogs in their hospital beds. "Good. So, now you know not to do something that is completely stupid, right?"

"Right," Sonic sighed.

"RIGHT," Shadow said incredulously.

"Good. Glad to see you got you heads screwed on straight now." Tails rolled his eyes, before walking out the door.

Once Omega had his arm reattached, he stepped over to Shadow. "Friend Shadow, shall we try this shopping cart race again sometime?" he asked.

Sonic and Shadow stared at him. Their answer was immediate.

"NO!"


End file.
